


This Blows (Yes, You've Said That)

by flipflop_diva



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Fluff and Humor, Gen, Sharing a Bed, Trapped
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-21
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-03-02 16:26:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2818688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flipflop_diva/pseuds/flipflop_diva
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Rosa and Amy's undercover operation goes horribly wrong, they try to make the best of it. Or at least Amy does.</p>
            </blockquote>





	This Blows (Yes, You've Said That)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [scintilla10](https://archiveofourown.org/users/scintilla10/gifts).



“This blows.”

“Yes, I know. You’ve said that about a hundred times in the past two hours.”

“I’m saying it cuz it’s true. This blows.”

“Do you think it blows any less for me?”

Rosa’s expression didn’t change as she studied Amy up and down. “Yes,” she finally said. “Because you’re Miss Perky who loves Christmas and snow and snowstorms and nothing ever blows for you.”

Amy frowned. “That is so not true!” she exclaimed, but then she paused, consciously adjusting the look on her face and trying again — “That is so not true” — in a much lower, less happy tone of voice.

“Please,” Rosa said. She turned back to the window and crossed her arms over her chest. “You know you secretly love this.”

“What?” Amy said. “The part where we’re stuck in this stupid hotel room with a broken heater because there is a freakin’ blizzard outside and we probably are going to be stuck here till after Christmas? Or the part where our first undercover assignment was a total disaster and Holt is going to be _so disappointed_ in us if we ever get out of here to tell him? Or _maybe_ it’s the part where my boyfriend broke up with me and now I get to spend my holiday with _you_ , the same person who tells me every five minutes that this whole situation — and I assume me — ‘blows’?” She paused for breath. “So tell me which part of that I secretly love.”

“All of it.”

“Oh my God!” Amy threw her hands up in the air. “Are you real? Are you even real? Why am I even talking to you? Why? Ughhhh.”

She turned around and threw herself facedown on the queen-sized bed that hogged up most of the room — because _of course_ she also loved that there were no rooms with two beds available for this last-minute and completely failtastic U.C. op — and wondered if it was at all possible to just sleep until after Christmas and if Holt would be disappointed in her if she did. She was still ruminating over that when she heard Rosa shift positions — or at least she assumed she did since the floor creaked — and the ever-famous words left her mouth: “This blows.”

•••

“This really blows.”

“This blows balls so big Santa couldn’t even fit them in his sleigh.”

“That doesn’t even make sense.”

“Sure it does,” Amy said. She yanked the cover up further around her neck, as if it would do any good (of course it wouldn’t. It only uncovered her feet and left them freezing).

“No,” Rosa said. “It doesn’t. Santa is magic. Everything can fit in his sleigh.”

“Not these balls.”

“That makes no sense. Aren’t you listening? Santa is magic. He can make everything fit. His sleigh isn’t that big. How else would he fit every toy for every kid in the world in there if he wasn’t magic? Or do you think he makes stops for refills?”

“Why do you have to be so logical?” Amy grumbled. “It was a good metaphor.” 

“It was a horrible metaphor.”

“You think everything is horrible.”

“Not everything.”

“Okay,” Amy said. She turned her head to look at Rosa. It wasn’t hard. They were barely an inch apart. Any closer and they would be cuddling. Not that Amy was opposed to that since she didn’t remember ever being this cold before in her entire life and at this moment she couldn’t think of any death that would be worse than freezing to death and being found in the shape of a human ice cube next to Rosa. She imagined Holt would be _very_ disappointed that they did not, in fact, share body heat like they had been trained to do.

“You were saying.” Rosa’s voice interrupted her thoughts. “At least it sounded like you were going off on another horrible tangent. Maybe I’m wrong.”

“Oh!” Amy exclaimed, suddenly focused again. “Yes! I mean no. You are not wrong. Or yes! You are wrong. Because it was not horrible. But no, I was saying-”

“Can you just say it already?”

“Name me something you don’t think is horrible.” Amy grinned, and then frowned. When did smiling start hurting? Was this a sign of approaching death? She shook her head and focused. “I bet you can’t.”

“Sex.”

“Sex what?”

“Sex isn’t horrible.”

“Hmmmm.” Amy went back to frowning. She hadn’t been prepared for that. Damn it! She was always prepared. But wait …. “I thought everything you did with other people was horrible?”

“Who said I need other people?”

“Oh. Ohhhh,” Amy said. She must have looked horrified or something because, for a second, she thought she saw Rosa’s mask crack.

“That wasn’t horrible either,” Rosa said.

“What wasn’t?”

“That expression you just made.”

“Oh. Well. Thanks I guess?”

“It wasn’t a compliment.”

“Okay, then,” Amy said, and she pulled the blankets up over her head so Rosa couldn’t see her expression anymore.

•••

“This still blows.”

“If someone was actually blowing us, do you think we’d be warmer?”

“Probably.”

“Do you want to blow me?” Amy asked.

“No.”

“No?” Amy scowled. “Why not? I’m very fun, I’ll have you know.”

“Because I don’t like you.”

“You love me.”

“No.”

“You do. I know it.”

“No.”

“Keep telling yourself that. I know the truth.”

“I’m not blowing you.”

“You’re not blowing me _now_ ,” Amy said. “Now.”

•••

“This blows a little less.”

“It still blows.”

“But a little _less_ ,” Amy clarified again. 

“Because it’s Christmas morning?”

“Because there is a tiny bit of heat!”

“Yeah,” Rosa said. “I guess that part doesn’t blow so much.”

“See?” Amy said. “And the snow is melting. And Holt said they’re going to have us out of here like that!” She lifted her hand to snap her thumb and forefinger, but frowned as her fingers were too numb to make a noise. Beside her came a muffled sound. She turned her head. “Was that a laugh?” she asked.

“I don’t laugh.”

“I think that was a laugh.”

“I don’t laugh.”

“But yet, I think that was one.”

“Just stop talking until they get here to rescue us.”

“I told you this blows a little less.”

“It still blows.”

“But a little less.”

“Yeah, fine. A little less.”

Amy grinned to herself. That she would call a victory.


End file.
